In Which I Ponder My Children's Futures

In addition to being dyslexia awareness month, ADHD awareness month, Down Syndrome Awareness month, and probably a bunch of other things I'm unaware of (somewhat ironically) awareness month, I recently learned that October is disability employment awareness month.

Most of us have seen the feel good stories about businesses that exist to employ people with autism, Down Syndrome, or other disabilities. There are also people with those disabilities working in "normal" jobs, though it's not highlighted on the news so often. Unfortunately, when you have a visible disability like Down Syndrome that everyone knows includes some level of intellectual impairment, it can be hard to get people to take you seriously as an adult and employ you, even if you're perfectly capable of doing the job competently.

When you have an invisible disability, the struggle is different. You need to decide whether you should even reveal your disability to your potential employer and what effect it might have if you do. Barring a cure or an amazing new treatment that allows her to ignore her diabetes, this question will be most applicable to Kittygirl when she enters the workforce. Diabetics struggle every day with this question. If they reveal their condition to a potential employer during the interview it might be a strike against them. Even though they can't legally be discriminated against due to diabetes, it does happen. However, if they don't reveal it in the interview process, they need to decide when or if to make the big reveal after starting on the job. If they reveal their diabetes they might face prejudice, but, if they don't, they might be in a dangerous or even deadly health situation if their blood sugar drops very low and their coworkers think their odd behavior indicates drunkenness or illegal drug use.

Those with an invisible disability like dyslexia or ADHD won't be at risk of dying if no one knows about their condition. The question they face is more along the lines of whether they want to risk facing prejudice if they reveal a condition that is part of what makes them who they are. This is particularly true for adults who take medication to treat ADHD. Most people are okay with kids being on medication for ADHD, but the presumption is that the kids will eventually outgrow the need. Since the stimulants used for ADHD are sold and used illegally, adults who take such medications for legitimate reasons can come under scrutiny.

Both of my kids, as I've mentioned before, will need to have good health insurance if they need to continue on the medications they're currently taking into adulthood. For Kittygirl, of course, insulin will remain a necessity unless there is a cure or an alternate medication that treats type 1 (in which case that medication would become a necessity). Squirrelboy, on the other hand, MIGHT outgrow his need for the help that his medication gives him as he matures and learns more strategies to deal with his chaotic brain. He also might not.

Unless the U.S. wises up and approves a program that provides free or cheap healthcare for all paid for by our taxes, my kids and many others will need to consider what kind of benefits are offered or how they will pay for them independently as they consider future careers.

Squirrelboy's current dream is to be a filmmaker or YouTuber. Since those aren't exactly careers that offer guaranteed steady work, it will be interesting to see how he tackles that issue as he moves into adulthood. Insurance wouldn't be the only issue. Running your own business also requires organizational skills that Squirrelboy doesn't have and that would be very difficult for him. In his defense, not many 14 year olds would be ready to run their own business and he has time to learn. As long as he's committed to learning the extra skills that he'll need to master because of the way his brain works, I think he has a bright future ahead of him.

In Which I Realize Just How Useless My College Major Was

Today at breakfast Squirrelboy commented that some of his friends who go to other schools have been surprised that his favorite class in high school is English. Mr. Engineer and I reminded him that we, too, were surprised his favorite class was English until we got to know more about his teacher and how the class is run. What Squirrelboy loves the most is the fact that, because his school focuses on project based learning, they're learning to write things with a practical purpose and learning that writing will be useful in their adult lives. I told Squirrelboy that, while I loved English class because reading and writing are my favorite things in the world, most of the writing I did was writing papers about books that were simply for the purpose of my English teacher and read an assign a grade too. Then I paused and realized that, because I have both a B.A. and and M.A. in Spanish with a literature focus, that's pretty much what I spent the majority of my educational career doing. I read books that most people don't care about and wrote papers about them that were of no practical use to anyone. Well, good thing I wasted six years of my life......

No, seriously, my college and grad school experiences were great and helped make me the person I am today. It is, in fact, really useful in my daily life to be proficient in Spanish and to have a knowledge of other cultures. However, when it comes to actual marketable skills, my education netted me very little. Ultimately, that was not detrimental to me. I did manage to pick up some teaching skills by being pushed into the deep end as a teaching assistant in grad school. I continued teaching part time while working as a campus minister for a parachurch campus ministry and attempting to raise up enough financial partners to do ministry full time. The whole fund development thing never worked out well for me, and I eventually left and found a full time job teaching Spanish at a small Christian college near Chicago. I would have needed to continue my education and get a PhD to keep that job and get tenure, but then year Mr. Engineer and I got married and moved back to Kentucky after just one year teaching there. I continued to teach part time as an adjunct at two local schools and substitute teach in the public schools until Squirrelboy was born. Since then I've been a stay at home mom. I made a few (literally, just a few after expenses) bucks teaching coop classes when I was homeschooling Squirrelboy, but, for all intents and purposes, I have not been gainfully employed for the majority of my adult life.

This has worked out fine for me because a) I was born into privilege and could fall back on help from my parents when I was single and not making much money b) I had not chronic medical conditions that required regular doctor visits or medication so it was fine that I was without insurance for a couple years and c) I'm now married to a man with a stable job, a good income, and health insurance. If either a, b, or c were taken away I could have been in serious trouble at some point and I might have thought more about studying something that would more logically lead to a job. I had the freedom to study what interested me, and I never realized what an incredible gift that was. When I look at my kids today, I wonder if their challenges will allow them to have that same freedom.

Thankfully, the medication Squirrelboy takes for ADHD is not necessary for him to stay alive, but it makes the parts of his life that involve attention to detail and focus about 1,000 times easier. Right now this mostly applies to school, but it's likely to apply to whatever job he has as well. He's currently interested in photojournalism and/or filmmaking. Neither job, at least in today's marketplace, normally comes with a steady paycheck and insurance. Before we meet our deductible, his ADHD medication is $200 a month. I don't even want to know what it would be without insurance. I don't want his atypical brain to stop him from pursuing his dreams, but I do wonder if it will have to be figured in.

Kittygirl, on the other hand, does need synthetic insulin to live. In case you've been living under a rock, and haven't heard about this, there are many people in the U.S. who can't afford their insulin. There are multiple stories of young adults who died just months after leaving their parents' insurance or being laid off because they couldn't afford the substance that keeps them alive. In addition, managing Kittygirl's diabetes is a million times easier because of her insulin pump and continuous glucose monitor. People  with diabetes without insurance, or with pathetic insurance, struggle just to get enough insulin to stay alive. Using devices like Kittygirl's is completely out of reach. I don't want this to be Kittygirl's story in young adulthood. I want her to be able to pursue her dreams and not worry if they don't result in obvious marketable skills. However, already now I find myself nudging her toward careers that would be likely to provide a good insurance policy.

Here's where I turn political. It shouldn't have to be this way. In the majority of nations in the developed world, healthcare is a right and not a privilege. Yes, you can't always get the absolute top of the line services that the privileged elite in the U.S. can get, but you can still get what you need. Sometimes there are waiting lists for things like insulin pumps and continuous glucose monitors. However, you can eventually get them if you're patient. You're not fearful of going bankrupt if you get cancer or you or your loved one are involved in a catastrophic accident that results in months of hospitalization. My hope and prayer is that, before my kids reach young adulthood, the U.S. will have caught up with the rest of the developed world and being able to afford to stay alive (in Kittygirl's case) or to live well (in Squirrelboy's case) will not be on their list of adult responsibilities.